Friday, June 18, 2010

I will choose

It has been a long time since I blogged. I promise not to go so long again. I could say “busyness” has been my excuse for the lack of blogs but that is only partially the truth. I sit down to blog and nearly get overwhelmed.

*Overwhelmed that my children are so active.

*Overwhelmed that for so many people, I choose to wear so many different hats as Mom, Wife, Supporter, Nurturer, Counselor, Mentor, Chief Boo-Boo Kisser, Bodyguard, Bouncer, Boss, Coach, Referee, Enforcer, Chef, Maid, Taxi Driver, well, you get the idea....

*Overwhelmed that my children are growing so fast and how can I put into words the changes

*Overwhelmed that since my last blog, we have celebrated Thanksgiving at the Beach, Christmas, 5 birthdays, 1 ten year anniversary (wow!), installed a trampoline, been on a missions trip with our family, survived several youth group trips, lost a first tooth and had two tooth fairy visits for two of the three kids, and sat through the first of years and years of sporting events.

*Overwhelmed that I have millions of mundane moments day in and day out with my three kids and fabulous husband and overwhelmed with grief for our friends who don’t get any more of those mundane moments with their sweet Annie Jane.

I have literally sat down dozens of times to blog but keep coming back to our friends. How can I share with the world the happenings of our normal/crazy family when their world has been rocked to the very core of their foundation? Don’t hear me say that I have put life on hold. I guess I have simply put “bragging” about my “normal” life on hold. Have our friends? No. They grieve everyday for their sweet baby girl but live life for their other two.

Why? We live in a world rocked with tragedy all the time. Why has this affected me like this? Peter & Sarah are dear friends of ours. Our lives are mirror images of each other in so many ways. Both living the life of pastors in a community that is unique and yet foreign to us with three children, nearly equal distant in age and the exact same gender and birth order.

In early fall, the process began and ended rather quickly. Of course, it didn’t really end. The process, no doubt continues for them. For all of us just on completely different levels. I will spare you the details of what happened, but will link you to their page.

How can I celebrate with the blogging world a tooth lost when little Annie will never get her first tooth?

How can I celebrate with the blogging world a birthday of my baby girl Ella when Baby Annie will never taste the joy of her first cake?

How can I celebrate with the blogging world the mundane childhood of my three kids when Annie has been prematurely robbed of nearly every mundane moment her parents could have hoped for her?

I will choose to.

I will choose to celebrate with the blogging world the birthday of my children because my children are worth celebrating. Annie is worth celebrating, too. So are Annie’s brother and sister, William and Kate.

I will choose to celebrate with the blogging world the end of a successful school year because my children worked hard. Knowing Annie’s parents, Annie would have been required to work hard in school, just as my children are required to do.

I will choose to live this day forward before the blogging world because my children have friends and family that miss hearing about the funny things they do and celebrating the crazy, mundane, normal things of our life.

I will choose to celebrate the short life of a beautiful little girl that fought hard to make everyday of her short six months count for those around her.

I will choose to celebrate the testimony of the glory and grace our Savior has bestowed on a family that has chosen to serve Him
no matter what.

I will choose to honor my God by bragging on the gifts He has chosen to give me for the duration they are under my care with a new respect for the fact that none of us are guaranteed tomorrow.

I will choose.